Funny Computer Jokes

I farted in the Apple store and everyone yelled at me

It's not my fault they don't have Windows!
How do trees use the Internet?

They log in
Why don't cats like shopping online?

They prefer a catalog
Press any key to start

where is any key?!
Right now, I’m at work, using the Internet

But in my mind, I’m already at home, using the Internet
Wifi went down for five minutes, so i had to talk to my family

They seem like nice people
Why do programmers hate the outdoors?

There are too many bugs
What is the computer’s favorite food?

Where did the computer go to dance?

To a disc-o
What is an astronaut's favorite place on a computer?

The space bar!
My son is so lazy that he won’t even empty the trash in the computer recycle bin
I went outside once

the graphics were amazing but the game play and storyline were terrible
Delete cookies?!
Don't worry, I'm from tech support
Can't you do anything right?
I don't enjoy computer jokes

not one bit
My new year's resolution?

Probably 1280x1024
How did the computer programmer get out of prison

He used the escape key
The two states of every programmer. I am a god. I have no idea what i'm doing.
The night I lost control
The 3 things that the most people lie about on the internet:

1: Yes, I am 18 or older.

2: I have read and accept the terms and conditions

3: Hold on, I’ll be right back
Hackers in movies. Hackers in real life.
Why did was the computer late for work?

It had a hard drive
I changed my password to "incorrect"

so anytime I forget and enter the wrong thing, the computer tells me what it is
If I was an operating system, your process would have top priority
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