Funny Difference Jokes

What's the difference between an arts degree and a large pizza?



A large pizza can feed a family of 4
What's the difference between me and a calendar?


A calendar has dates
What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?


Snowballs
What's the difference between a dog and a cat?


A dog will drop everything and come when you call. A cat will check its schedule, and try to fit you in
What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?


After a year, the dog is still excited to see you
What's the difference between ignorance and apathy?


I don't know and I don't care
What's the difference between time and Kobe?


Time passes
What's the difference between a well dressed man on a unicycle and a poorly dressed man on a bike?


Attire
What is the difference between a man and a cat?


One eats a lot, is lazy and doesn’t care who brings the food. The other is a pet.
What's the difference between a cat and a comma?


One has its claws at the end of its paws, and one is a pause at the end of a clause
What is the difference between God and a surgeon


God doesn't think he is a surgeon
What is the difference between a calendar and you?


A calendar has a date on Valentine's day
What’s the difference between a smart man and a stupid man?


Nothing


They both think they know everything
What is the difference between eight and nine?


One
Do you know the difference between this pizza and your opinion? I asked for the pizza.
What’s the difference between an African elephant and an Indian elephant?


About 5000 miles
What’s the difference between a $20 steak and a $55 steak?


February 14th
What's the difference between men and government bonds?


Bonds mature
What is the difference between a sperm and a lawyer?


None, both have a one in a million chance of being a human being
I know the difference between right and wrong


Wrong is the fun one
You take away his looks, money, intelligence, charm and success...


and there's really no difference between me and George Clooney
What is the difference between a chicken and a turkey?


Chickens celebrate Thanksgiving!
What's the difference between a politician and a flying pig?


The letter F
What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?


Outlaws are wanted
What is the difference between a teacher and a train?


One says, "Spit out your gum" and the other says, "Choo choo choo!"
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JOKES FOR ADULTS
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