Funny Fat Jokes

Running away doesn't fix your problems…

Unless you're fat
Relationships are like fat people...

Most of them don't work out
Of course you're not fat

Just grab a couple of chairs and come sit with us
Want to look thinner?

Hang out with fat people
I'm not saying she's fat...

but if I had to name 5 of the fattest people I know. She'd be three of them.
What do you call two fat people talking?

A heavy discussion
How hard is it to seduce a fat girl?

Piece of cake
It’s not nice making fun of fat people

They’ve got enough on their plates as it is
Doctor: You're obese

Patient: I'd like to get a second opinion

Doctor: You’re quite ugly too
Yo mama so fat

when you walk around her you get lost
Yo mama so fat

when Dracula sucked her blood he got diabetes
Me: I'm gonna start eating healthy

Also me: Treat yourself one last time, you deserve it
And a diet coke please

I don't want to get fat
I'm not fat

God gave me airbags cause I'm precious
You're fat

Don't sugarcoat it because you'll eat that too
Do you know what i got you for Christmas?

Fat. I got Fat.
"Wow you look great! Did you lose weight?"

"Hey! – does that mean you thought I was ugly and fat before!"
Do you know what i got for Christmas? Fat. I got fat?
Mom they called me fat. You're not fat! your just fluffy
You're fat. That's very hippo critical
How many Americans does it take to fill the Grand Canyon?

About 4
I used to have winter fat

but now I have spring rolls
Fat people. They know how to really live... just not as long
Would you like to dance?


You must’ve misheard me. I said you look fat in those pants
And a diet coke I don't want to get fat
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